And the summer...I went to Summit and I went to Boise, and those two trips basically made my summer.
Summit was a combination of really good speakers and a mix of really genuine and superficial people, you had to kind of pick through the people and find the good ones. Honestly, although I learned alot, it wasn't my favorite experience of the summer. I've never really liked church camps and retreats...I never really felt like I belong with the people that are there. I dunno, I've tried a bunch of times, and each time, its been a struggle. Parts are good, but the overall feeling I'm left with is not belonging.
The trip to Boise was a blessing. I was able to see huge mountains and I had alot of fun hanging with my friends: Rachel and Alex, two people who have been a part of my life for a very long time, and it was really fun to be with them again. But honestly, my best experience this year came right after that, and that was dual enrolling at UWF.
I was really nervous beforehand, but I went and I signed up for four classes and it was the best thing I did all year. I look back now and I realized how completely skewed my opinion was of myself. The world, for me, was seperated into to two groups: normal people, and me, and as far as I was concerned, those two groups could never mix. I was so hard on myself, I viewed myself as a social outcast that could never really mix and blend into the student life at UWF.
Maybe I am a person that "normal people" will want to become friends with. It was a total revelation to me, and honestly, I am still surprised by it sometimes.
I realize now that I totally catagorized myself, and that was really wrong. UWF helped me realize that there are so many different types of people out there that there is no such thing as "normal". There are super wild people and super conservative people, frat boys and ROTC guys, the campus is just overflowing with different kinds of people, and that is a wonderful thing.
The problem is that throughout that semester, I began to fall away somewhat from my roots, not reading my Bible as much, not praying as much, letting a cuss word slip out here and there, and now, as the year draws to a full circle, I am realizing that one part of my life that needs to change, so I've decided I want to do a summer long YWAM discipleship training and missions trip, to really bring closer to God and keep me grounded. I look back on the years and see how far He has brought me, how much He has done for me, and how much I owe Him.
New Year's Resolution that really counts this year is to make God the center of your, and my, life. Weight loss, makeovers, and goals are all good things, but if God is not FIRST and CENTRAL, if we are not seeking FIRST His Kingdom and His Righteousness, then all our efforts are worthless. He is all-powerful and deserving of all our praise and efforts, everything we do should be done to give Him glory. And you know what? If we focus on God and really straighten out our priorities, I have a feeling all the other goals will fall into place :)
Anyways, have an amazing New Year's night!! Celebrate, reflect, and praise God for giving you another year of life, that's sure what I'm going to do!!